2003-02-19

It has been this way for a few weeks now. It started with just my right foot, but now, they are both swollen. My blood pressure is fine, there are not other “bad” signs and the Doctor isn’t worried.

Nothing seems to help my poor feet. I can put them up all day and they won’t go down much. I can drink 4 gallons of water and pee all night long and they won’t go down much. In fact I wake up with them swollen. Sometimes walking around helps, but again not much.

It seems a little alien to me to look at my feet and see instead of my 8.5 medium width feet that fit so nicely into a nice pair of dainty looking keds these huge monsters with puffy toes that can barely squeeze into my boots. Most of the time I don’t even bother with my own shoes and instead wear husband’s—his feet are one size bigger than mine and a whole lot wider. When I realized his shoes fit me better than my own, it was just one more thing that made me realize that this just isn’t the body I’m used to. After 33 years, I don’t recognize my own body. My feet shouldn’t look like squares.

Last night I could feel the tops of my feet jiggling as I walked. How weird is that?

One of my co-workers has just been fascinated with this swelling. Especially the part about it being confined (early on) to just one foot. And even now, the right foot is considerably more swollen than the left. It is kind of funny to have someone you work with ask about your feet every day. Amazingly I don’t find this annoying at all. I find it funny.

One of my work friends told me that when she had her daughter her feet grew. They swelled a little but mostly they got longer—and it didn’t really go away. She went from a size 7 to a size 8.5. She thinks she’s good for only one more child, otherwise she won’t be able to buy any more shoes, as her feet will be too big for the chic numbers she wears now. I’ve never been one to care about owning a lot of shoes. I usually have a good pair of tennies, a scummy pair of tennies, a pair of sandals, a pair of loafers and two pairs of dress shoes. I don’t buy shoes that look cute but don’t fit right. But I do get emotionally invested in my shoes. I love my blue tennies and would hate to never be able to wear them again. My boots I could replace in a heartbeat but I like my dress shoes (same style one pair is brown the other black, very comfortable wear them to work) too much to part with them. So I really hope this resolves itself after the babies are born.

I also hope giving birth gets rid of my newfound clutzyness. But that’s another story for another day. Perhaps a day after I get the pudding I just spilled off the keyboard.

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