2008-09-05

It doesn't feel like they should be going, that they are really too little. aren't they the sweet smelling chubby crawlers that they were yesterday? Aren't they busy in the corner having a "binkie war"? Shouldn't I be defrosting some mashed squash for lunch?
Nope, in fact they are tall (47 inches give or take for both of them--Amy a little less, Emily a little more), and confident, and smart. The last five and a half years has rushed past in such a blur, I find myself doing the same thing as the girls do quite often--looking at their baby or toddler pictures with amazement and disbelief.

Tuesday, Amy was up very early (and thankfully waited until she heard us up before pouncing on the bed) and Emily was not too far behind her. Only Emily admitted to a tiny case of nerves. They were both dressed and ready to go a good 15 minutes before we needed to leave. Husband and I walked them there, left them in the classroom with a woman I've only met twice (although husband assures me that she's got state certification and a bit of experience under her belt), and walked home. I only cried a little.

I thought Kindergarten would be a transition for me, from preschool where I was really involved--on a weekly basis, to "real school" where they would spend a good chunk of the day with other people who are not me. Instead, I'm feeling a bit like I want to go back to preschool. Oh heck, some times I'm feeling like I want to go back to roly poly baby hood. Will someone please remind me how much easier mobile little people are to deal with.

So, I spend every morning from 9-noon wondering how they are, wondering how I'll manage to do this every day, wondering if I'll be ready for first grade. Of course, I spend every afternoon from say 3-5 wishing that naps were still the norm for us and that I could send them back for an hour or two, but right now, the house feels too empty, too quiet. I may have to break out the dollhouses and play a bit myself just for the comforting sounds of little girls telling stories.

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