2009-09-14

I'd like to think that I'm not all that unusual in my size or tastes. I'm short and a bit overweight according to the BMI tables, but I don't think you'd look at me and say such. I need cotton, no nylon, polyester, silk or blends. I like briefs but I wear low rise and bikinis too. I like stuff that doesn't give me a VPL (visible panty line). and I need underwear that doesn't show at my waist at yoga or when I'm sitting at my desk at work. I don't need sexy or even colors. I need dependable non-chafing, hold things in place, don't advertise to the world. In years past I've bought--ok granny panties. Specifically I've bought hanes briefs in a certain size.

Well, a while ago I lost some weight decided I needed smaller granny panties and bought the next size down and they are not comfy. In fact they're snug and I don't like them. But all my regular size underwear is developing holes. Holes are not acceptable in my underwear world (although small holes will be tolerated for a while). So during back to school shopping I went in search of my Hanes granny panties. No place had them. Target had a spot for them on the shelf but were out of my size. So last week in my new found freedom to go shopping whenever I wish and not have to bribe anybody, I went to target and bought a six pack for $5. They weren't all white, but eh. See why I love granny panties--so cheap!

I got them home, ripped them open, unrolled the first pair and was about to toss it in the hamper when I noticed something. The pair I unrolled was HUGE. I didn't want to try it on, because ... well ewwww. I held them up to a pair I already owned and they were an inch wider and an inch longer. true granny panties. So now I'm stuck. Do I try to return these at Target? And then what? Buy a smaller size, a different style, write Hanes a nasty note? Will target even take them back (although if not, well they were only $5 even if it pisses me off it isn't a big amount of cash)? Why are target and Hanes conspiring against me to make my life more difficult?
Don't even get me started on bras. Let's just say I love my body just the way it is and am disgusted that the bra company that I've always bought my midget bras from (playtex thank goodness it fits--BTW) has decided that they need to all have thick foam padding. Thick! And after a while it caves in on my poor tiny body giving me not the illusion of more and smoother breasts but of concave weird shaped breasts.

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